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Rest: how to get what you really need

November 19, 2016 by Andrew Marshall Leave a Comment

Rest is not something we talk about very much, is it? We just keep on keeping on, like the rabbit in the Duracell advertisement. Rest, after all, is for wimps, the aged and the infirm. Real men and women keep going. The secret of success, whatever that is, is to push yourself and then push some more. Or at least, that’s the message that often comes across for aspiring high-achievers. So we become a little conditioned to the idea that rest is for the idle. Feeling guilty if we are doing nothing is the usual result.

Even nature has a rest

The trouble is, we lose touch with our own natural cycles. From where I’m writing this, I can see trees. Lots of rest treetrees. The funny thing about the majority of these trees is that at this time of year, they take some time off. And they don’t seem to have any emotional hang-ups about stopping and having a break. The leaves change colour and fall to the ground. There is much beauty in this and nobody has a go at the trees for being lazy.

Less than an hour’s walk from here are oak trees that are hundreds of years old. Centuries of growth and rest have ensured these mighty trees continue to flourish. There is enormous power in knowing how to be still, and nature knows this very well.

Cycles of activity and rest

Because our minds are so busy and our emotional side so complex, it is easy to lose touch with our natural stillness. Natural patterns of life fade and lose priority. But everything in nature has a cycle of activity and rest.

Our bodies require rest as well as exercise, and our minds do, too. For sure, we can keep going when we are tired. Most of us have to. But we also need to listen to what our body (including the brain) is telling us. If we ignore fatigue, nothing works as well as it should. A motor car might run without servicing and maintenance for a long time. For reasons of economy, many car owners run their vehicles in this way. It can be done. But eventually, things wear out. The car breaks down.

Isn’t sleep enough? Meditation can supercharge you

If we enjoy good quality sleep at night, we get several hours of rest. But sleep isn’t always enough in this noisy and hectic world of ours.

We can also experience a better quality of profound rest consciously from a short but regular meditation. It may be a simple one, such as sitting quietly observing the flow of the breath. Or we may use a mantra or visualisation. Whatever meditation we do, it will give our minds and bodies the nourishment of very deep rest. This is not instead of sleep but a natural adjunct to living a full life. Many people find that meditation improves sleep as well as our waking hours.

rest mindfulBut I don’t have the time to do that

Meditation changes the quality of life but for some people it seems too far a leap. The usual reason is being too busy. (Refer to the first paragraph!) For those who are too busy, there is an easy practice that anyone can do, whether they meditate or not. Stop. Stop what you are doing for a minute or less. Turn the computer screen off. Put your pen or book down. Whatever it is you are doing, take a break for a few conscious breaths. Notice the breath as you breathe in and as you breathe out. Do it once, then a second and third time. Maybe once more for luck. It’s important that you stop to do this and breathe. That’s all. And it works.

More like this in The Art of Not Doing – How to Achieve Inner Peace and a Clear Mind

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Filed Under: Meditation, The Art of Not Doing Tagged With: energy, happiness, health, inner peace, meditation, mindfulness, tranquillity, wellbeing, zen

Stillness: why it is vital for your health

October 12, 2016 by Andrew Marshall Leave a Comment

Stillness is with us all the time. It is not a product of meditation or Stillness Tibetanything else. We may practise meditation, yoga, or taiji, or lose ourselves in art, music or gardening. If we are lucky, we may experience some stillness. But these disciplines and pursuits are not responsible for that – they simply lead us back to our natural quietness. The quietness never leaves us. We just choose not to remain with it.

Stillness for health and wellbeing

Activity can be addictive. It is so much easier to distract ourselves by being constantly busy than to be still. When we are still, we have to face ourselves. That can be uncomfortable so we have become very adept at avoidance. If we can’t find something to do, we look for entertainment of some sort. Even the small pleasure of a cup of tea or coffee with a friend seems to require an examination of smartphones these days.

This can cause problems for our sense of wellbeing because the mind never rests. Some agitation is always there and the body constantly responds to our fluctuations in mood. Breathing, heart rate and blood pressure alter as our thoughts and emotions vacillate.

Unnecessarily, we wear ourselves out. Sleep patterns are less natural and fail to refresh us fully. Many modern diseases result from stress but we still keep piling it on. If this sounds a little bit grim, it is. But we can reverse the process.

Stillness is more than doing nothing – it’s an art

If we try to sit and do nothing, the mind will wander. From sheer habit, the mind grasps at some things and rejects others. The winds – the subtle energies of the body – reflect the chaotic patterns of thought. Emotions and feelings rise and fall. If we’re tired, we may drift off into sleep. Stillness, however, eludes us. Either the mind is too busy or it descends into fog.

Teachings abound on methods of training an erratic mind to come to a state of clarity and stillness. The modern way seems to be to keep going from one set of teaching or guidance to another. This is no good. Acquiring a skill takes time. It requires patience. The mind needs plain food, not an elaborate buffet that we keep picking at until we have too much.

Stick to one path

Find a way that suits you and stick to it. And keep on sticking to it. Don’t veer off course. We may be tempted to try something else. Someone may offer this teaching or that. When that happens, look at the mind that is thinking that way and don’t move. Gradually you will learn the art and become fully acquainted with your own innate stillness. And you will know that happiness and wellbeing are present here and now.

More on finding the path to stillness can be found in The Art of Not Doing

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Filed Under: Meditation, The Art of Not Doing Tagged With: happiness, health, inner peace, meditation, mind, mindfulness, tranquillity

Saying sorry can be very healing

May 29, 2016 by Andrew Marshall Leave a Comment

To err is human. So is saying sorry. We all make mistakes most days. Most of them are insignificant but if they affect someone else, we may feel a little (or very) uncomfortable. That discomfort is reflected in the energy of our body. Unless it is put right, we will be out of balance. Some say it’s karma, the universe paying us back. I prefer to think that we set up a disturbance in our energy system that will need redressing.

Putting things right

If we know we have done wrong or made a mistake in some way, we should try to put it right. That might simplysaying sorry out of order be making a sincere apology or it could be making amends in some way. By making a genuine attempt to put things right (and we cannot always do so) we inject positive energy into the memory and so help to heal a negative pattern.

But what if we can’t? It might be that we cannot do anything or apologise because we do not know or cannot contact anyone who was on the receiving end of what we did or said. Sometimes – and we’ve probably all been there – it may be that to say or do anything would make matters worse.

Saying sorry as a meditation

In those instances it can be helpful to visualise saying sorry. In other words, we imagine the other person in front of us and offer from our hearts a deep and sincere apology. Note the words deep and sincere. It is as though we are saying sorry from our soul or spirit. It is not an unburdening of guilt so much as the expression of a genuine desire to undo any harm we may have caused.

This is like a meditation – a focus of the mind to create a positive effect. Of course, the offended party is totally unaware of this process. But at a more subtle level, who knows what may go on? In ourselves, we shift what can be a huge energy block. That can heal us and because of that it can also help to heal relationships.

You are a recording star!

Here’s a thought – everything we do or say is being recorded. Our whole being is a recording instrument and what it records affects our energy at all levels.

How we think, speak and behave leaves an internal imprint. This in turn alters the flow of our energies. These dictate how we feel and react to people around us and our environment. They affect our mental state and therefore how we perceive things. Others can often sense whether our energy is positive and open or whether parts of us are closed off. So how we are inside will determine to some extent how others react to us.

If we are positive and reacting reasonably well with the world around us, our energies will tend to be more settled. We will feel happier and calmer. Conversely, if our energy pattern is chaotic, it will tend to draw us into situations where things often go wrong. Even sod’s law is not entirely without reason. So we need to avoid negative actions and negative ways of thinking. This is not an injunction to be angelic, but at least if we try to act and think ethically, we will be more comfortable with ourselves and life will be more enjoyable. Saying sorry when we have messed up is a no-brainer, then.

More on this in The Great Little Book of Happiness

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Filed Under: Happiness, Meditation Tagged With: cause and effect, chi, energy, happiness, health, tranquillity, zen

Inner peace and how to find it

May 1, 2016 by Andrew Marshall Leave a Comment

I often give introductory sessions on meditation to groups. It is always a major surprise to them how relaxing and calm they feel after only a few minutes of a very simple meditative exercise. Many say they come because they want to experience some inner peace or tranquillity but they never expect it to arise within themselves.

Why we naturally desire inner peace and tranquillity

Most of us are very busy. We go from one task to another and there seems little time for true relaxation. So is inner peace busy peopleinner peace within reach for people leading normal busy lives? Or is it the preserve of monks and nuns, or the wealthy?

Living in a society where virtually anything can be bought, perhaps we are conditioned to think that tranquillity can only be acquired with money or by a complete change of lifestyle. With money we might go to a spa or on a retreat, and we can buy relaxing music and so forth to listen to. At greater cost, we could have the experience of spending time in a flotation tank or some other artificial environment.

But we don’t need to do any of these things in order to experience inner serenity. Perhaps those who come to the introductory sessions are expecting me to give them something but really all they get is the opportunity to be with themselves. And that is the amazing thing – peacefulness is not something separate from any of us; it is us, it is our true nature. We don’t need anything external in order to find it.

Being more in touch with who we really are

Fulfilment can only come when we are peaceful inside. It is only when we are peaceful that we begin to be more in touch with who we really are. That is the simple reason why each and every one of us, consciously or unconsciously, desires inner peace and tranquillity. It is natural to want it but it cannot be bought; we have to discover it for ourselves. A very busy person might say that they have far too much to do and that they thrive on stress and stimulus. Their whole system is in a more or less permanent state of excitation.

If we are like that, we tend to seek more and more things to do or to experience and try to find fulfilment that way. But we are not in touch with our true nature. In fact, we are blind to the possibility of its existence simply because the mind and body are highly agitated. Because we are so uncomfortable, we think whatever it is we want from life is to be found “out there” rather than “in here”. At some point, though, we will know that “out there” is not the answer and that we have to look within.

From The Great Little Book of Happiness

For online meditation tuition, my Meditation Course contains four approaches to inner peace.

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Filed Under: Happiness, Meditation Tagged With: happiness, inner peace, meditation

Guilt – why it robs us of self-esteem

December 4, 2015 by Andrew Marshall Leave a Comment

“Guilt is a wasted emotion,” it has often been said, yet most of us have seeds of guilt lurking somewhere in our psyche. Guilt can seriously harm our self-esteem and confidence. Our work and relationships can suffer because we hold back our energy and our presence. This source of self-flagellation needs rooting out and the process is called self-forgiveness.

To forgive ourselves doesn’t mean not to have a conscience; ethical speech and conduct (and, indeed, thinking) are vital aspects of the path of self-development. The survival of the human race depends on moral behaviour. Self-forgiveness means letting go of harmful feelings of guilt that prevent us from being happy and realising our full potential.

GuiltMoreover, if we cannot let go of guilt within ourselves, we cannot truly and completely forgive others. If we resent something within our own make-up, there are going to be things we will resent in others. So it is not self-indulgent to forgive ourselves – quite the opposite. To put it another way, are cultivating a sense of self-acceptance.

Our starting point is to build up our self esteem. We don’t need to analyse where we think we are failing because that’s focusing on the negative. We simply start by building up a positive picture.

Here is a powerful exercise for building up self-esteem. Don’t underestimate it – it works. Find a place to sit quietly on your own and allow yourself a comfortable five minutes or a little longer if you wish:

Releasing ourselves from guilt – a meditation for building self-esteem

  • Visualise yourself seated in a totally empty room. Say to yourself, “I am.” This is a positive statement. Repeat it a few times: “I am.”
  • Imagine someone coming into the room and placing a gift – some flowers, say – at your feet. Hear this person say, “This gift is for you because you are who you are.”
  • Embrace your visitor. It is yourself – your soul, your spirit, your higher, wise self.
  • See someone else come into the room. This second visitor places a golden bowl at your feet and says, “This chalice is for you. It holds all opportunities in life and is always full.”
  • Pick up the bowl and embrace it. It is the sum total of all past and future actions.
  • Feel yourself smiling inside and say to yourself, “I welcome all that comes because I am.” As you do this, see yourself fill with light and be at ease.

This technique could be done once a day for a week and then whenever there is a feeling of self-doubt. By embracing our whole self and our past and future actions, we forgive everything about ourselves. In other words we accept who we are. In energy terms, this can have a very profound effect.

Guilt – putting things right

Sometimes, though, there can be something that really bothers us.  If we have harmed somebody, spoken out of turn, acted unjustly, omitted to do something or whatever it happens to be, we should use any opportunity we can to apologise or to put things right. If that is not possible or if no-one else is involved, we can use the following method:

  • Visualise the person (or group) you have harmed or wronged, or if no-one else is involved, you should visualise your guide, teacher or other higher being for whom you have respect and loyalty. Simply explain yourself truly and honestly  and say, “I am truly sorry.”
  • Then see yourself attempting to put things right and making amends by bringing the action back to yourself or “undoing” the action.

This method is very simple but its effect can be very deep indeed. Sometimes it may need to be done more than once. It all depends to what extent the sense of guilt has been ingrained but it is better to do it once and see how our feelings are affected over a period of time than to keep repeating it. Many of these techniques are like taking a medicine – it is important to allow time for healing to take place before taking another dose.

More on this in The Great Little Book of Happiness. This article is an adaptation of an extract from Chapter 2.

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Filed Under: Happiness, Meditation Tagged With: fulfilment, guilt, happiness, meditation, self-forgiveness

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