Sex is one of the strongest motivators and deepest desires within the human psyche. It’s so powerful that we can think we love someone when we are merely attracted to them.
Sexual desire can arise within a loving relationship, so it would be an oversimplification to say that sex has nothing to do with love. Love can emerge, too, in a relationship that begins as a predominantly sexual one. In either case, desire forms an important aspect of sex. Part of that stems from the purely biological side to sex. Our bodies are programmed for sexual reproduction, so desires can naturally arise from hormonal and other biochemical changes.
Sex and subtle energy
If we look a little more deeply, underlying and informing the body is a subtle energy system. This includes the network of meridians in acupuncture and other healing arts. Tibetan medicine describes the energy flows as winds, which gives a hint of how subtle, and indeed volatile, they are. Sex and the sexual function play a major part in this system. If artificially stifled, there can be significant interference with the natural flow of energy. The Victorians may have a lot to answer for!
Subtle forms of energy affect the body, its nervous system and its general functioning. Our emotional and mental states can affect the balance and flow of that energy. Conversely, the energy can affect our moods and feelings.
Longer term problems
If moods and feelings are strong or prolonged, problems can arise. The flow of subtle energy can be altered or obstructed and become semi-permanent. These can have physical effects resulting in health problems if the energy disturbance remains uncorrected.
Sometimes, for example, we may see that a person has poor posture. Although we cannot know all the causes of it, usually there is an energy problem which stems from something deeper.
Stagnation and the sacral centre
The point about energy and sex is that very often there is a deep energy problem in and around the sacral energy centre. This centre corresponds to part of the lower abdomen a little above the pubic area. Stagnation or congestion can be the source of many problems. Too high a concentration of energy there, for example, can give rise to a distorted sexual expression or unbalanced desire. (Of course, there can also be the opposite effect where stagnation or blockage causes a degree of frigidity.)
Sex or love…or celibacy?
A person can often mistake strong sexual desire for love. It is so easy to turn the words “I want you” into “I love you”. The person saying them may even believe what they utter, as may the person hearing them. As anyone really knows, that isn’t love.
Do we need to become asexual or celibate in order to love truly? The answer to that must be a resounding no. Unfortunately, centuries of conditioning, much of it in the name of religion, have beaten the spirituality out of sexuality. Only love and understanding can heal that chasm.
An adapted extract from Awakening Heart.