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Taking refuge can give us what we really want

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When there’s a storm blowing, people and animals take refuge from it and, in a sense, that’s what many of us are doing now. There are plenty who are still working, of course, and others very busy looking after young children or with other responsibilities. But for the majority, it is a form of retreat, or can be. Time to reflect, perhaps, and time to enjoy being oneself. It has certainly caused me to reflect on many things, including a couplet from one of Thich Nhat Hanh’s breathing meditations: “Breathing in, I go back to myself. Breathing out, I take refuge in my own island”.

Taking refuge is finding safety inside as well as out

For many years, I felt slightly uncomfortable with that. It seemed quite at odds with John Donne’s famous phrase, “no man is an island”, with which I was sternly admonished as a teenager, and which thereafter always echoed in my brain. Suddenly, though, in this enforced retreat it makes sense. Staying at home takes care of the physical refuge. It also provides the opportunity to go further than that and bring the mind home, too, closer to its natural state.

Bringing the mind home

A good start is to resist the urge to check news and social media many times a day. We just don’t need so much information. It simply irritates the mind, uses up enormous amounts of energy, and drains our qi. Why shorten life unnecessarily? Taking refuge reverses that process of looking outwards all the time. It allows the mind to come to a more peaceful place, where true creativity lies. Surprisingly quickly, we can be satisfied with less and soon find fullness, here and now. Isn’t that, deep down, what we want? What we really, really want?

Drawn from The Art of Not Doing: How to Achieve Inner Peace and a Clear Mind

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If home is where the heart is, we must learn to be there

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Just a few days, and for other countries a few weeks. That’s all it has taken for our world to be turned upside down and inside out. While key services are working flat out, most of the rest of us are at home. That can be a challenge. Like many, if not most, I must confess initially to having had a slight dread of being confined for any length of time. But I very quickly learnt that accepting instead of resisting was not only vital but could bring a great sense of peace – Yin soothing Yang.

Too much Yang requires Yin

The world has been fixated on the generation of power and wealth, whether financial or otherwise, for a very long time. This is an expression of Yang – outward movement and growth. Yin – the opposite – is just as necessary. Humanity cannot expand its activities and relentlessly seek to satisfy its desires forever. We know that if we exhaust our own body and don’t rest, we get sick. Humanity has pushed Nature, of which we are an integral part, too far and for too long, making her and us sick.

Restrictions are Yin

Some people think that Yang is strength whilst Yin is weak. Not so. Our very roots into the Earth are Yin. Foundations are the source of strength. (Try pushing over a good taiji player who is rooted.) Restrictions on our movement and social gathering are like medicine. Though we would rather not have them, we know they are necessary. Being confined to our homes for a while is like a compassionate lesson from Mother Earth – learning to be at home on the planet responsibly. It’s time for her children to grow up.

Keeping healthy with Shibashi

Qigong can help keep the body in balance and a good set of Qigong movements is Shibashi. It reinvigorates and strengthens the body, supporting the immune system and very good for the lungs. Here is a free video originally prepared for our tai chi class but that can be followed fairly easily by anyone.

Can’t settle? Take a look at The Art of Not Doing .

Take care and stay safe.

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Losing those we love, and the search for constancy

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We all lose friends and loved ones, at various times during the course of our lives. When separation happens, life can be painful. In that moment, a familiar feature of the landscape of our life disappears and nothing seems the same anymore. Like a drawing in wet sand that gradually fades with the ebb and flow of the waves that pass over it, what was real to us is no longer there.

It is not just emotional pain, either – the fine and rather subtle energetic connection that existed between us is rent, like a broken cobweb. That has to heal.

Constancy versus change

Most of us resist change. There is a deep aspect of our psyche that craves constancy. A bit of excitement is okay, but on our own terms, please. We could say that constancy is more Yin in nature and change is more Yang. When our Yin side is strong, we enjoy a stronger connection to life and are more able to cope with change.

Life is a play of these apparent opposites; one cannot be without the other. When we are emotionally attached to someone, to something or to some ideal, the constancy in that relationship satisfies the Yin aspect. It provides an anchor or root. When that is removed, our balance is gone and we become very wobbly. We will miss the joy and stimulation of that friendship, too – the Yang side – which is why so often we can feel numb.

Restore your connection

We are very complex creatures with many layers of energy, mind and emotions. When we suffer loss, it is very easy to lose our perspective on life. The computer of the mind goes a bit haywire. That is why it is important that we push the “safe restore” button. Stand or sit up straight with your feet flat on the floor or ground. Let your body reconnect with the Earth and your mind with the Universe. Keep the head up but let the shoulders relax. Don’t do anything else or look for anything to do. Let the breath look after itself. Stay for a while…

Book now for our next meditation and energy workshop in Staffordshire, which is coming up soon. More details.

Do less to accomplish more? The Art of Not Doing: How to Achieve Inner Peace and a Clear Mind is still available.

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Habits – when and how to manage them

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Forming habits, now there’s a thing. Someone told me once that it takes three weeks to form or break a habit. I’m not sure where that came from or whether there is any evidence to support it. Nevertheless, the turn of each new year has features editors of newspapers and magazines publishing articles on the new habits we urgently need to acquire or lose. Is that a habit of theirs they could safely shed, I wonder?

Habits don’t like awareness

We all know that new year resolutions generally fail before the end of January. Except the one not to make any, which I find works well and lasts all year! Old habits die hard, so the adage runs, and in any event it would be silly to suggest that we should have no habits all. Many are very useful, like washing our hands after we have been to the bathroom. If only everyone did. The problem comes when our repetitive thinking and behaviour (which is what habits are) have a negative impact on ourselves and on others. Then there is something we can, and should, do.

Just observe and break the chain

The key to change for the better is not self-flagellation, dieting, running up mountains or taking ice baths, interesting and challenging though such activities may be. Rather it is to become aware of what we are doing and why we are doing it. Simple awareness can work wonders because it is the portal for our innate intelligence. Try it sometimes; better still, often. Before doing anything, pause and observe. Break the chain of one automatic response after another. Starve the habit of oxygen. Those few moments of comparative silence allow something rather good to happen. What it is, though, you must discover for yourself.

Do less to accomplish more – read my book The Art of Not Doing – How to Achieve Inner Peace and a Clear Mind

Free guided meditations

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Clarity: why it’s a vital antidote to this mad world

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Clarity? In this crazy world of ours that seems rather remote, doesn’t it? Yet the parlous state of affairs we humans find ourselves in is down to one thing: our collective consciousness.

Loss of clarity is down to inner pollution

The natural quality of consciousness is pure but, like water or air, it can easily become polluted. Everything we think, say or do arises from it and contributes to the collective pool of humanity. As individuals, we cannot change the world, perhaps, but we can take care of our own consciousness. If life seems a bit of a jumble at times, it’s because we have a muddled state of mind. So what can we do?

Fulfilment and peace come through clarity

We have to restore clarity. Once we take a step in that direction, our lives immediately start to become a little more orderly and more pleasant. Well begun is half done, as the saying goes. A peaceful and clearer mind then actually becomes quite an attractive proposition. We find we don’t need to keep looking for things to do.

Stop looking

Constantly needing to be occupied is just habit. In fact, it is far better to identify what we don’t need to do. Doing less actually often does accomplish more. Seeking recognition or approval in any form is pointless. Yet so much energy is wasted on posting mundane activity on social media and wanting to be liked. It all just adds to the clutter, as do all those inspiring quotes and negative political messages. Let’s just enjoy some clarity instead. That will certainly help us, and it may go towards helping the world.

From the book The Art of Not Doing

Free guided meditations

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